Darlings, scoundrels. Again, I have not had time to correspond with you since Nikki Haley announced her bid so many years ago (it feels, at least). There are so many more Republicans in the race now and we will do our best to cover them in order of how much I hate looking at their faces. You can decide for yourself which end of that … Continue reading 2024 Candidates: Mike Pence
My precious angel babies, did you think I had forgotten about you? Yes, things have been very busy at the secret underground pyramid-shaped headquarters of Pyramid, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t had my eye glued to the news that, apparently, we’re having a presidential election next year. Didn’t we just have one of these? Smash Mouth was right: the years start coming and they … Continue reading 2024 Candidates: Nikki Haley
In six rounds of carefully managed balloting, Republicans made their dividing line extremely clear. The 200-or-so members of the party who advocate conspiracy theories are on one side and the roughly two dozen members of the party who believe those conspiracy theories are on the other. They have to unite if they’re going to name a Speaker of the House. They have not yet done … Continue reading “I Never Imagined Leopards Would Obstruct MY Face,” sobs leader of the Leopards Obstructing People’s Faces Party.
To start this off correctly: human beings respond poorly when you confront them and try to get them to change their mind about something. Being proven wrong is upsetting and people often respond as if they’re being physically attacked. Moreover, when talking about something less concrete and more nebulous, people find it easier to dig in and refuse to change their minds. So when Uncle … Continue reading What to say to your friend who tells you they’re voting Republican this year
No, wait we just did this. I’m serious. I’ve been too busy to write anything since the last time we had this article and I’m beginning to be concerned this is a kind of Groundhog Day curse. Back in the fog of July, when Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson was unceremoniously told to scram, it seemed like the Conservative Party was finally preparing … Continue reading Who The ‘ell Are All These Prats, Then?: Looking at the Second 2022 Conservative leadership race
Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, the man who was drenched in sleazy scandals but somehow never drowned in them, is finally out at Number 10. What felled him was one final hurrah of sleaze: a scandal in which Johnson put a serial sexual harasser in a key governmental position and then had to feign surprise when he did some more sexual harassing. This, on top … Continue reading Who The ‘ell Are All These Prats, Then?: Looking at the 2022 Conservative leadership race
In his concurrence in Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization, Justice Clarence Thomas suggested that it was high time the court consider whether the Fourteenth Amendment’s language about liberty should really apply to all of these scandalous concepts it’s been applied to. Thomas highlighted access to contraception, consensual sex, and same-sex marriage as areas where the court might have overstepped by asserting the government could … Continue reading Justice Thomas seems to think a lot of things can be overturned – except Loving v. Virginia
A draft opinion of the Supreme Court in Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization was leaked late Monday and seems to show that the court is going to overturn Roe v. Wade, the landmark 1973 case that upheld a right to abortion access. The opinion would put into caselaw a long-circulating conservative idea: that Roe v. Wade was decided incorrectly and should be overturned because … Continue reading What is liberty?
The Walt Disney Company used to control Florida’s government. In 1965, Governor W. Haydon Burns hosted a press conference with Walt Disney where they announced the Florida Project, a sprawling development that became Walt Disney World. There has not been a time between 1965 and early 2022 when Mr. Disney’s company did not exert a heavy influence on Florida’s state government. To maintain that influence, … Continue reading The old rules don’t work anymore
Three of the largest economies in the Americas – the U.S., Canada, and Mexico – have a decades-old free trade arrangement. Slightly modified under the Trump administration, the deal ensures that most goods can be made in any of the three countries and sold in any of the other three countries. Originally called the North American Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA) and now called USMCA, the … Continue reading It turns out Republicans are manufacturing some of the supply chain issues for political points
